Is it just me, or does the world seems to be moving and evolving at a million miles per minute?
With all of this change comes tremendous uncertainty, which in and of itself is a grieving experience.
It isn’t just due to illness or death. According to The Grief Recovery Institute, it is because “[Grief] is the conflicting feelings that come at the end of a change in a familiar pattern of behavior.” It is also “a loss of hopes, dreams, and expectations.”
While each of our experiences are unique, what remains universally true are the wide range of feelings we have.
The thing I most want to share is that whatever you’re feeling, it is normal.
It is also important that we acknowledge all of our feelings and give them a voice — preferably with a safe, non-judgmental listening ear. Someone who isn’t trying to fix you, but rather can just say “Yes, that makes sense, and it’s okay to feel how you feel. You aren’t crazy, and if you are, so are we all.”
One thing that has become quite evident, during these rapidly changing times, is our need for a healthy, genuine connection. According to Harvard Positive Psychologist and author of The Happiness Advantage, Shawn Achor, connection is the number one indicator for happiness. Fear and stress on the other hand, not so much.
So what can we do? How can we give and show up when we are so depleted?
- Start by being compassionate to yourself. That means be nice to yourself and give yourself the benefit of the doubt (grace) when you aren’t perfect.
- Breathe. Take moments to pause and feel your breath.
- Make a self-care list, things that help you feel well — mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
- Take time to reflect on what and who really matters to you. Write in a journal or share with a trusted, non-judgemental confidant.
- Tell people you love them and care about them, because you never know, and it is better to say all the things.
- Do a random act of kindness. Helping others (once we have helped ourselves) can feel really good
- Allow yourself to vent (a journal works) and have all the feelings.
- Once you have vented, it can feel helpful to be grateful (starting with yourself).
While we don’t always get to choose what happens, we do get to choose how we respond.
If you’re ready to choose compassion, starting with self (because by now you know that you can’t give what you don’t have), schedule a free consultation with my team!